Test: What’s your worry weak spot?

You might be convinced you’ll learn something from mentally re-running negative past events but as rumination lowers mood, it rarely leads to useful insights or even a realistic perspective. Rumination can also churn up emotions yet the irony is it might be what you turn to for reassurance during times of uncertainty.

At the heart of a ruminating habit is often concern to keep everyone happy, and worry about being liked and approved of. You might also feel stuck as it’s hard to generate motivation for change when your default thinking revolves around moments that make you cringe. Over time, rumination can chip away at confidence if after every social interaction you have a nagging sense that you’ve said or done the wrong thing.

Breaking a rumination habit takes effort but it starts by acknowledging there is nothing new to be learned from re-hashing past events. If a ‘cringe’ moment pops into your mind, either let it go or limit your thinking to what you’ve learned as a result. Using mindfulness can help resist a ruminating cycle – rather than following your thoughts, try grounding yourself and instead tuning into the sights, sounds, smells and sensations around you.

Even brief moments of paying attention to the here and now, dotted throughout the day, can create calm and turn down the internal drama.