Test: What’s your personal boundary weak spot?

Although it’s often overlooked, your relationship with yourself is the most important of all, as it provides the foundation of your relationships with other people. A sure sign that your boundaries with yourself need attention is feeling stuck or directionless, whether in your day-to-day routine or on a bigger-picture level.

Weak personal boundaries let destructive habits sneak in and take root, even if you know from experience what you need to thrive and may encourage and support the people you care about to take good care of themselves. Get stuck in a self-neglecting cycle for long enough, and you risk losing touch with what you really need to feel your best. Another red flag that your personal boundaries need attention is setting expectations of yourself that you wouldn’t expect from anyone else, then feeling like you’ve failed when you don’t reach them.

Sometimes patterns of thinking can become so ingrained that they act like a lens through which we view our experience of life, making it hard to keep sight of the boundaries we need. In essence, personal boundaries help you treat yourself with respect, and that means accepting that you won’t be at your best without the right lifestyle choices. Start by simply ringfencing time and headspace to put what you need to thrive in place.